Whew! Made it (through the year)!

I've been eating too much, and too much junk, in the past two weeks. That's due, in part, to the end-of-the-year stress and exhaustion. Moreover, it has to do with recent revelations about loving myself and my body. Because I've been so focused on liking the way I am, I haven't been trying to change myself at all, including my health. That's a slight problem, because I'm not in the best of shape and my cholesterol is pretty much through the roof. Eating all these "bad" things has led to me being more lethargic than I was while I was forcing myself to eat "better" earlier this spring.


I think I need to work on my eating habits and overall fitness. That'll be easier for the next two weeks, because I'm living at home. No cafeteria food, no donuts and coffee, and I have a treadmill right downstairs. But sadly, easier doesn't mean easy. Oh well, it's worth paying attention to for at least two weeks. (I'm leaving for Europe in 12 days, by the way!!)

In order to work on being healthier, while continuing to try not to beat myself up too much about things, I'm keeping track of what I'm eating online, and I'm going to try to get in a little bit of exercise each day (even if that's only a ten-minute walk). In fact, today I did exactly that: walking a little over half a mile in 10 minutes on the treadmill. I wanted to go further, but my allergies are giving me a nasty headache...

I made it through my freshman year of college. Sure, I spent the entire first semester fighting an illness. And spent part of the second semester dealing with the repercussions of that illness, things like insomnia and being too dependent on my boyfriend. It's still a little melancholy to see it end, though.

Aside from that, I'm spending most of my time and energy getting ready to go abroad for a couple of months...it's exciting and exhilarating and nerve-wracking. I think it'll be really, really good for me, though. 

Fitness Means More Than Thinness

Someone asked me if I'd lost weight yesterday. Although I haven't, it was really nice to hear that I'm looking good. My theory is that she thought I looked nice because of the confidence & self-acceptance I've been gaining. You know what they say: "confidence is sexy" (or something like that).

I've lost my obsession with weight loss, lately. Yeah, I'm a size 16/18. Yeah, I'd rather be a 12 or 14, but I can be happy as I am, too. That being said, I'd really like to get in better cardiovascular shape (increase my endurance). Partially this is to do with the fact that I'm headed to Germany in a little under a month, and, when I spoke with a member of my host family yesterday, she mentioned that some members of her family are pretty sporty.

A picture I took of Castle Neuschwanstein the last time I was in Germany. Gorgeous!

 To say the least, I'm anything but athletic. I'm not coordinated, nor do I have much endurance right now. I've never been much of a runner, but I don't think I could jog for more than a few minutes right now if I tried. I'd love to increase my fitness in that sense, both to keep up in Germany, and to enjoy being more active. (Also for my health, of course!)     

So, I think I'll start off by trying some fast walking, maybe around 3.5 to 4.0 mph, and maybe get on the elliptical/cross-country ski machine sometimes. I'll try for 4-5 days a week. I think that Germany will be great motivation for this.

And if I lose weight? Cool! If not? I can be beautiful just like I am now, and I'll increase my fitness.